Today's sunrise woke me up to a very painful reality check. As i was thinking in bed, a sense of heaviness burdened my heart. It left me questioning myself. Doubting my own self. Fearfully, i dragged my 'soul' to the mirror. And Oh, that face scared me. Who was she? Where was that girl who once ruled my mirror with her eyes so bright and a smile so real? What has become of her?
It took me not much time but a great deal of courage to finally realize and accept the fact that i had changed so much. All those problems and all those continuous failures had murdered the optimistic and strong girl that i once was. And no matter how many times i tried to stretch my lips, it just did not seemed like a smile. I 'had' to confess to myself that i was no longer happy. No longer who i used to be.
I then decided that it is high time i now re-cleanse myself. I cannot afford the risk to stay like this forever. Life has just started and all that i faced was probably Life's only way of telling me that this is how it is always going to be. Problems are never going to end. In fact, there may be more harsher ones punching me in the future. And failures, i shall simply have to accept and use them as a 'furious' motivation to continue fighting. I shall just have to go with the flow.
But, i will NOT let all those bends break me. Instead i am going to make it make me. With a positive attitude, i will deal with whatever i have to. Facing challenges, taking decisions, making mistakes, comprehending, and learning from it. Yes, that is exactly how i am going to learn and live my life. I will not allow myself to miss the 'old' me, for i am going to again be the 'old' me. The happy me! The vivacious me! The inspiring me! The fearless me!
It took me not much time but a great deal of courage to finally realize and accept the fact that i had changed so much. All those problems and all those continuous failures had murdered the optimistic and strong girl that i once was. And no matter how many times i tried to stretch my lips, it just did not seemed like a smile. I 'had' to confess to myself that i was no longer happy. No longer who i used to be.
I then decided that it is high time i now re-cleanse myself. I cannot afford the risk to stay like this forever. Life has just started and all that i faced was probably Life's only way of telling me that this is how it is always going to be. Problems are never going to end. In fact, there may be more harsher ones punching me in the future. And failures, i shall simply have to accept and use them as a 'furious' motivation to continue fighting. I shall just have to go with the flow.
But, i will NOT let all those bends break me. Instead i am going to make it make me. With a positive attitude, i will deal with whatever i have to. Facing challenges, taking decisions, making mistakes, comprehending, and learning from it. Yes, that is exactly how i am going to learn and live my life. I will not allow myself to miss the 'old' me, for i am going to again be the 'old' me. The happy me! The vivacious me! The inspiring me! The fearless me!
Till my next post, Eat-Pray-Love !
:D
:D
Great piece of writing, very inspirational indeed!!! Good job Pretty Babes!!
ReplyDeletethank you lauri dear :)
DeleteU have grown up enough to know urself and findout who u were at past and wat u lyk to be in present or future.. salute u fo ur self confident to reobtain wat u were... dats wat m doing rite now .:)... alwz fighting dear!!
ReplyDeletethank you so much for your kind words birat.. and yes, i'm sure you will also one day find that courage to move on... you too keep fighting sathi :)
DeleteWell,i am going through the same phase..wondering what happenend to me, actual me.. I was so vivacious about everything and totally vibrant and now hell this freaking crazy world took away the charm of my life :( but hell yeah whatever at one point, I say to myself I got eveything I need within myself though not like before but yes it is within ME and once again I get shiny,less than before but yes shiny ... God bless every creature and give strength to enjoy the life they got just for once ;))
ReplyDeleteHey mysteriousgal, :)
Deletewell yeah i assume something similar happened to you too.. but to think of it, i guess it's not that times got bad,.. maybe its because we are growing up.. getting to know more about life... experiencing.. but yeah, we should not let all these bends break us as i said.. :) good luck to the both of us.. hehe