It is a Tuesday morning. And i'm supposed to feel very good on this particular day of the week. But sigh, i'm not. :( I just hate it when i'm not happy on those days when i have to do my shows. It's tough. Really tough to go on air with a frowning soul. To act as if you have nothing else going on in your mind. To fake a fake smile.
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| My make-up for today. |
And the thing is that i don't even know what's been eating me up. Guy problem? Nah! Then what? Work problem? Family problem? All of these yet none of these. Maybe or maybe not. Totally pissed off for unknown reasons. Sorry, it's not even PMS. Nothing's working. Songs are not helping. Not even a conversation with a girlfriend. Strangely, not even food !
But yes, this is not the first time. I'v done this a countless number of times and so will i today as well. I will enter the studio, sit in front of the microphone, clear my throat, take a deep breath, curve my lips, let the intro music play, and i will start. I will talk and talk and talk until i'm all fine. I will pretend until i feel good. Cause believe it or not, that's what i've always learnt to do. To pretend until it feels real.
I know it's quite disappointing to hear all this from someone who is always talking about positive things in life. But you've got to understand that i have my days as well. Days when trying to be optimistic seems totally out of the question. Dark days.
So, today for a change, can you help me feel better instead? I don't know how. Maybe a nice word or two, maybe a big smile? Anything to help me live through the day. Trust me, I've got a long long day ahead. Can't wait to finish my work, get back home and just sleep it off. -_-
Till my next post, Eat-Pray-Love !
sometimes 'eating-praying-loving' ain't just enough! you need to sleep-sulk and poo as well ;)
ReplyDeletethis feeling shall pass. down comes the rain - up comes the sun! :)
true , eating praying loving aint just enough .. but it's wat keeps me going esp on days as such... :) thanks anyways !
ReplyDeletethat feeling has passed.
I have these "DArk days" at times. I'm still trying to find a way to pull me out of it :(
ReplyDeleteSame here. Dark nights are more easier than dark days. I just sleep it off. Do the same. :)
Delete"I will enter the studio, sit in front of the microphone, clear my throat, take a deep breath, curve my lips, let the intro music play, and i will start. I will talk and talk and talk until i'm all fine. I will pretend until i feel good. Cause believe it or not, that's what i've always learnt to do. To pretend until it feels real."
ReplyDeletepretending its true, pretending i feel good... its a compulsion that comes along the way for everyone !! some might totally avoid it, the whole circumstance, lucky them i guess... but i feel good because recall that then you'd be amazed that you did it even when you did not want to, that itself is an accomplishment cause nothing always goes the way we want !! also, i feel like what we did, pretended to feel good, we did for good otherwise how would be able to complete the task and then get paid ?? lol its true though, think about it !! well pretty, just face it, enact that nobody, even yourself, would know nothing about how you really feel, complete the task then say YES I DID IT :D
:))
ReplyDelete